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Blows your back out as your homie
Gotchu walkin funny as a testament to our friendship.
makes you cum in the spirit of comradery
Got ur legs on my shoulders to show u how deep our friendship is
hits it from the back to let you know im here for you
so in LOTR’s appendices it says that legolas eventually builds a boat and takes gimli across the seas and into the west, the gray havens. you know, the place arwen isn’t allowed to go because she’s in love with a human dude bUT LEGOLAS (AKA ‘YOU LITTLE SHIT’) JUST SAYS “FUCK IT” AND SNEAKS GIMLI INTO THE GODDAMN UNDYING LANDS LIKE CONTRABAND TWIZZLERS INTO A MOVIE THEATER
best literary analysis ever
Can u believe there are plants that are illegal
Can you believe there is love that is illegal
Have you ever lost something and thought, “if I could just open a portal to another reality where I haven’t lost it, I could steal it from me and get it back”?
How do you know that’s not the reason you lost it
On the downside, I’m not that attractive.
On the UPside, if I lived back in Aztec times, they wouldn’t sacrifice me to the Gods for my beauty, by tearing my beating heart out of my chest…
So there’s that…
According to science we are actually getting more attractive, so there’s a good chance they would consider you beautiful and thus sacrificeable. Sorry dude, no getting out of this one.
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